After an extended hiatus that coincidentally coincided with the NFL regular season and the break between American Idol seasons, we are happy to present to you the new and improved Shockey Brigade.

A lot has happened in the last few months. I heard that the Rays were in the World Series, the Knicks decided to sign Lebron James and Dwayne Wade, the Giants won the NFC East, and the Yankees got a few good players without upsetting anyone. Well done all! Good times.

Now that I’ve covered all of that, I’m moving on. I’m done with Fall 2008. The fall/winter season has come and gone and left me in a weird, sports-less void. I’m actually following the Australian Open while I count down the seconds to pitchers and catchers in Florida and Arizona. It’s pretty bad. How I got to this point, in chronological order:

1) The Yankees’ pitching sucked. Phil Hughes and Ian Kennedy were monstrous dissapointments for me. I guess I, like most Yankees fans, expected too much. They’re young so I forgive them, but their struggles were hard to watch. What I have a harder time dealing with is this nagging feeling that recent Yankees squads don’t have “it”. I’ll readily say that the idea of chemistry or mojo or whatever you call it is meaningless, especially in baseball, but I can’t help but watch the Rays and the Red Sox and think that they seem like real team units. Or maybe it’s just a few years of frustrating losses. Yeah, it’s probably that. Hey, nothing $420 million can’t solve, right?!

2) The end of the MLS season sucked. I love soccer and I follow MLS closely. I think all signs point to it being a very successful league, but the playoff system is a joke. First of all, I don’t love the idea of playoffs in soccer, anyway. But this year the Western Conference champions were Red Bull New York. New York. Western Conference. Red Bull. Basically, they were a wild card team that played in the Western bracket and won. Something doesn’t really work there. My advice? Suck it up and figure out a deal between USL and MLS to create a promotion/relegation system. MLS owners are terrified of relegation, but it won’t be a serious league until that’s introduced. It will also give American fans a taste of the excitement that promotion and relegation bring to a league - when a late-season game between the 10th and 12th placed teams is as meaningful as a late-season game between the 1st and 3rd placed teams. And the level of play in the USL is better than most think. Look at Montreal and Charleston, and Seattle and Toronto. Make it happen. Please.

3) The NFL season ended too soon. Maybe I’m just naive but I refuse to buy into the belief that that Plaxico shooting himself ended the Giants season. Maybe it put some doubt in the team, but they were good enough to be able to adjust. I blame Gilbride, and only Gilbride. The offense tried to compensate too much after they lost Burress. I understand defenses played them differently, but I always felt that an offense with that good a running game should’ve been able to adjust. Instead, we saw them try all sorts of weird, uncomfortable plays (reverses, direct snaps, empty backfields) to try to fool the defense. I’m no expert, but I don’t think the Giants won last year’s Super Bowl and this year’s NFC East by fooling opposing defenses. They ran over them and played a simple, efficient passing game. Where was that the last two months?

4) The Knicks and Rangers - I just can’t get into it. Maybe I have a harder time following both teams then I did when I lived closer to New York, but I can’t. Probably because they’re never on TV here. The Rangers are having a decent season and the Knicks are only two games out of the playoffs, but I’m just not feeling it this season. Yeah, I know, I suck. At least I’m honest.

5) Barcelona - Amazing. But again, until I get my GolTV subscription back in two weeks, it’s hard to follow when I can’t watch it. I’m also kind of scared that when I actually start watching games they’re going to play worse.

6) GW Basketball. Miserable. Painfully miserable. Like, really hard to watch… miserable. I’m on day 30 of my Karl Hobbs firing watch. It’s gonna happen, and when it does we’ll be [among] the first to bring it to you. That’s exciting, the idea of breaking news coming from the Shockey Brigade. But really, how bad a game coach do you have to be to get fired? How many times can you blow a game by deciding, “we’re up by ten with seven minutes left, let’s put in the guy who never plays. They’ll never expect it,” without getting canned? And four players have left the team in the last twelve months. That’s a lot for any basketball team.

You know what, I’m going to say that it’s breaking news every day Karl Hobbs doesn’t get fired. So…

BREAKING NEWS:
WASHINGTON, DC (Source: Shockey Brigade) — As of noon today, George Washington basketball coach Karl Hobbs has not been fired despite his 6-10 overall record. Oh, and get this… last night, at Dayton, with the score tied at 61 and 21 seconds left, GW was assessed a technical foul for having too many players on the court. Dayton hit both free throws and won. GW has now lost seven straight, and their coach is really, really bad.

There you go. We just made history, bitches.

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Like I said, he’s an asshole.

Anyway, nine minutes after DC took a lead in overtime, Blanco approaches midfielder Clyde Simms and punches at the ball. Sorry, by “punches at the ball” I meant “wallops him in the stomach”. Sounds rational, right? DC defender Marc Burch had enough and side-checked Blanco into the ground. According to Burch, Blanco reacted by trying to “poke Clyde in the eye and cut his eye open”.

He was red-carded, obviously, and his night basically ended there. Oh, except for that he head-butted a DCU employee who encouraged him to leave the field after his ejection and may have tangled with a police officer or two. Apparently they had to lock him alone in his locker room. Man, I love soccer.

If any American athlete other than Ron Artest punched a player, head-butted a lowly team employee, and scuffled with police… well, just imagine it. Imagine A-Rod going bonkers, on the field. Personally, I would laugh. And ESPN would overload and self-destruct.

Anyway, I hope to have some good updates shortly, and while the allegations I describe are all from relatively anonymous sources (and the Washington Post), there were over 4,000 people who saw it, so I don’t think I’m losing any journalistic credibility or anything. And if I am, who freakin’ cares!? This is a blog!!! Hahahahaha.

You’ll find the juicy stuff 27 seconds in:

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“Goooollllllllll”

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Today marks the pinnacle of professional club soccer - the Champions League Final. This year, for the first time, the Final will feature two English clubs - Chelsea (from London) against Manchester United. United is coming off their second-consecutive championship season in the English Premier League. Chelsea has finished second in back-to-back EPL seasons after winning the two previous titles.

Here to preview the match are the Shockey Brigade’s two resident football/futbol/soccer experts, David and Derek:

Derek’s Preview
Rain is forecast throughout the day and night in Moscow, and factored in with rumors of a poor playing surface, control in the midfield will be crucial. Normally under these circumstances in an all-English affair, my prediction would be 0-0 or 1-0 (essentially something really boring), but these teams know each other well. United will try to open up the game on the wings, which should give Chelsea a chance to control the game through the middle of the pitch. Both teams will take chances, so despite conventional wisdom I don’t expect a conservative match.

Chelsea has the stronger defense while United have the better strike force in Wayne Rooney and Carlos Tevez. The most intriguing matchup to me lies in the midfield, where the Blues have an edge. In terms of controlling the pace and flow of the game, I’ll take Makelele, Lampard and Ballack over Ronaldo, Carrick, Scholes and Park, though Ronaldo will be interesting to watch down the wings on counter attacks.

Ultimately, Chelsea’s defense will be too difficult to beat more than once or twice, their midfield will be able to manage an otherwise sloppy game, and Petr Cech will make us all remember the goaltender he was before he fractured his skull in 2006. For the Reds, Ronaldo might look effective but the Chelsea defense will keep him contained or isolated. On the other side, Didier Drogba’s size, speed and presence will lead to several clear-cut opportunities. If Chelsea can finish them, United will be left chasing the game - something they are unaccustomed to.

Prediction:
Chelsea 2, Manchester United 1

David’s Preview
I’ve got to agree with Derek on this one. I think it is as close to a tossup as one could imagine, and the odds of extra-time must be quite high. One would have to give United the edge in attacking options, but Chelsea’s midfield and defense have a noticeable edge. On top of the weather, one development that could change this is a reported training ground injury to Ashley Cole. He has a solid history of locking down Christiano Ronaldo and if he cannot play today I think the advantage will tilt slightly in ManU’s favor.

The wildcards in this game are the tactics and chemistry of Chelsea. Roman Abramonovich’s experiment of throwing money at the world’s best players has resulted in the evolution of an exciting young team built for the present and future to a disjointed European version of 25 guys-25 cabs. It is an indictment of the team’s current standing that Avram Grant is rumored to be on the hot seat. He inherited a team that was floundering in both the Premiership and Champions League and almost all he has done is win. There have been some notable exceptions, including tactical mistakes in the Carling Cup final and the embarrassing loss to Barnsley in the FA Cup. But in general Grant has created unprecedented success, including the teams win over Liverpool in the Champions League Semi-Final. Prior to that game, Liverpool in Semi-Finals was the white whale for Chelsea under former boss Jose Mourinho. In addition, Grant brought the team back to within two goals from the Premiership title. Yet he has a team where many of the established stars have expressed a desire to play elsewhere next year, and who have publicly feuded on both the training ground and on the field. The team appeared to rally around the death of Frank Lampard’s mother and if this sentiment can be maintained, a historic victory could be in the cards before this wannabe dynasty is blown up.

Manchester United deserved to win the Premiership title as it is a measure of who was the best team from the start of the season until the end, but the Champions League will be decided by Chelsea’s performance. At this point ManU is a relatively known quantity; they can play free flowing soccer, but will likely try and close down the midfield and slow down the game against an opponent such as Chelsea. They have talented enough players to unlock almost any defense, but Chelsea will likely have to make a mistake at this level for it to happen.

Prediction
By locking down the midfield and playing defense to their potential, Chelsea win this one 1-0.

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