So as we are whores to our readers here at Shockey Brigade, we are now offering a Kentucky Derby preview, based upon the three minutes of SportsCenter that I watched this morning.

Now according to the odds this appears to be a three horse race between Pyro (6-1), Colonel John (4-1) and Big Brown (3-1). The closest after these three are Z Fortune, Monba, Tale of Ekati and Gayego at 15-1. After them are nine horses at 20-1, including Smooth Air, Bob Black Jack, Recapturetheglory and Cool Coal Man.

So in a very particular order please find out top eleven picks for the 2008 Kentucky Derby. (Why eleven you say? Because 10 is the number of he who must not be named.)

11. Recapturetheglory – trying way too hard with this name.

10. Cool Coal Man – Sounds like someone from Pittsburgh struck it rich.

9. Bob Black Jack – Who comes up with these names?

8. Tale of Ekati – This sounds like an Anime movie….i’m not big in to that stuff.

6. Monba/ Gayego – These two horses sounds like a dance and the guy who pull it off, respectively. I cant dance.

5. Colonel John – The Shockey Brigade blog is strictly pacifist at the behest of Derek.

4. Z-Fortune- Whatever.

3. Smooth Air – This is my pick of the horse that will most upset the odds. Do you get points/money for that?

2. Big Brown - I wasn’t going to pick the front runner.

1. Pyro – Who doesn’t like fire? Also this guy just sounds like he’s going to win, and win with flair. As much as I hate to say it, he reminds me of the Christiano Ronaldo of horse racing, and that Portuguese ponce is good.

Remember, 20 percent of any money made at the Kentucky Derby through our one of a kind prediction must be paid back to Shockey Brigade. We will use this money to hire professional writers and comedians to make us look smarter and funnier than we already are.

PLACE YOUR BETS.

P.S. I’ve just learned that Vicente Fox, the former President of Mexico, is present this afternoon. I’m not sure what this means, but I bet its significant.

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